Wednesday, September 23, 2009

In Which Being A Gunner Doesn't Pay Off

Nobody: Prof. Crim Pro, I would like to talk to you about my grade last semester.

Prof. Crim Pro: Go for it, Nobody. Let's talk.

Nobody: Well, I got a B and...

Prof. Crim Pro: Ha! Really?!

Nobody: Yes, and....well. I was hoping that I could go over my final with you. I really want to bring my GPA this semester, and I want to know what I could have done better on that test, so that I can break out of my rut.

Prof. Crim Pro: Wow. I thought you would have done better, too. You seemed very clever in class....Yes. Well, let's see this thing....

Nobody: ....

Prof. Crim Pro: I mean. There's nothing wrong with it, per se. It's just, well...you lack that certain sparkle of brilliance that A students have. Know what I mean?

12 comments:

Eliza said...

Holy crap! What an asshat thing to say. And completely useless.

Virgin In The Volcano said...

As someone who also lacked that certain sparkle of brilliance in crim pro last semester, I would like to lend to law schools everywhere the words of the ever-wise Carrie Fisher: Blow my big bovine tiny dancer cock!

Legally Fabulous said...

aaaand exactly why I don't/never did bother trying in class. It's just not worth it. "certain sparkle"? I hope you told him to kiss your ass.
Law school is dumb.

The Namby Pamby said...

Is that certain sparkle the desire to be a gunner?

JD-Maybe said...

ahhhhhh! Iremember going over my Torts exam with the prof and him telling me that he doesnt know why he gave me such a low grade...talk about frustrating!

je said...

Ugh... I *HATE* the "I would've thought you'd done better too." EFF that.

adele said...

Ouch.

If it makes you feel any better, I talked to my Contracts professor about my exam 1L year, and the reaction was "You seemed like you were following the material quite well in class. Your exam... well, the answers are wrong."

That was about the time when I decided I was better off focusing my energies someplace other than school.

Jansen said...

I agree with Eliza. Asshat.

Jansen said...

I agree with Eliza. Asshat.

Amanda said...

That certain "sparkle"...cripes. Maybe next time sprinkle glitter all over your exams?? :)

(In)Sanity Gal said...

Wow - certain sparkle? that's awful. what the hell is it anyway?

Randy said...

It's nice to know that as I make my way through my newly-begun quest to get into/succeed (or not fail) in/graduate from law school, little will have changed from undergrad (at Wharton, where MBA egos get stuffed into Undergrad bodies, and the natives are just smart/rich enough to get away with it). I think I've met the -1L Pre-Gunners of tomorrow. They're in my class. All of them.

All rights reserved to my snotty and generally self-deprecating writing. And if your comments bother me, I'll delete them. That's right, pumpkin.
...How dreary—to be—Somebody!
How public—like a Frog—
To tell one's name—the livelong June—
To an admiring Bog!
-- Emily Dickinson